The Results are in

Well, I promised the results of my cleanse so when Grace and I headed to the Lake today I had her steal an extremely vain picture of me.  Looking good, wouldn't you say?

 Today has been a great day as I have started to add food back in my diet.  This ease out thing is so hard because I really want to EAT!  Unfortunately, I have to go slow and today was a delicious (sort of) mix of vegetable broth and a few veggies mixed with a glass of orange juice throughout the day.  The simple broth was tasty, but not as good as my sauteed meal that is happening tomorrow. Oh I simply cannot wait!

The lake was a blast.  Lily loves the beach and the "wato."  It is so wonderful to watch her enjoy the summer on the lake.

 Let me tell you though, it is exhausting.  From getting her covered in sunscreen, into her swimming suit, to the lake out on the sand, de sanded, dried off, back in the car and home, it is simply an energy sucker.  It makes the time go by fast while Bob is away, but I am tired.

Day 10- The End

I am officially over and so excited about it.  Yesterday really felt like the end in many ways and I went to bed last night dreaming about food.  A delicious mix of sauteed squash, peppers and onions over a bed of brown rice. OMG.  This morning I started with my lemonade and by 11 AM I was done.  My stomach was crampy and flat out hungry and I just couldn't drink the lemonade anymore.  I literally couldn't hold it down so I decided it was time to start the ease out.  Fresh juiced orange juice has never tasted so delicious.  I feel so accomplished and amazed at finishing my cleanse and simply cannot wait to enjoy fresh veggie broth tomorrow.  No kidding, I am actually looking forward to broth.  So yummy!  This diet is difficult because even after you finish the cleanse part, the "ease-out" phase still takes some time. 2-3 days worth.  It is so critical, but really hard to keep from eating that piece of toast.

My official weight loss as of today is 11 pounds.  I started at 126 and stepped on the scale ate 115 this morning.  As awesome as it is to be thin, I am ready to eat.  I will post a picture of my new svelte self tomorrow.

We put Bob on an airplane to Colorado today in the pouring rain.  I couldn't help but catch this precious moment of him with his Lily.  He is so precious with her and loves her so very much. Sweet Sweet moment in time.

Day 9 - I finally got that high!

It's official, I have made it successfully through day 9 and tomorrow marks the final day of my cleanse.  I am simply in awe of myself today and cannot believe that I am going to do it.  The sense of empowerment, health and strength that I have felt today can only be described as a high.  I am elated.  This is the first day that I have gone nap free and felt great with high energy.  The mental strength that I have found in myself is so incredible and to master a feat such as the Master Cleanse is a great source of accomplishment and wonder.  I am strong and I can accomplish great things.  No one can ever say that will power isn't one of my strengths!

Bob finished his 100 miles today a little early.  He ran 102 miles in 9 days.  Simply amazing.  Sometimes I marvel at how far we have come since the college kids we were.  I once told myself that I would never be able to run a marathon, now I've done 3.  I told myself that there was NO WAY I could do a cleanse like this because I loved food too much and could never go that long without eating and tomorrow I will have gone 10 days sans food.  It is simply overwhelming what we can do when we put our minds too it.  This cleanse has taught me that the only thing that holds me back from achieving great things is my own fears, my own self.  Well, no more.  The sky is the limit for me now!

Tonight was a special night because we got to go out to dinner with two of our dearest couple friends, Ron and Carol Stogner and Jonni and Eric Fichtner.  Jonni and Eric have been amazing friends and spiritual mentors and Ron and Carol have been our life group leaders over this past couple of years. We will miss them terribly when we go.

Just to be clear, I didn't eat, instead I lived vicariously through everyone else.  It didn't even phase me.  Nothing is holding me back tonight!

Day 8- Ain't it GREAT!!!

Day 8 is coming to a close and I am honestly starting to get excited and empowered.  I might get that cleanser's high after all!  I conquered my biggest fear today, The Salt Water Flush (SWF).  Now for those of you unfamiliar with all the cleanse entails, every night during the cleanse you are supposed to drink a natural herbal laxative tea and in the morning do a salt water flush.  Drinking an herbal laxative tea, No Problem.  SWF, different story.  To do the SWF you take 4 cups of water mixed with 2 teaspoons of sea salt, mix it up and chug it.  Because of the salinity, its like sea water, your body doesn't absorb it so it passes right through you, thus "flushing" your system.  When I read about this flush while doing my research, I can honestly say that I got serious panic attacks.  The SWF is a major fear factor for me.  I decided to just try the herbal laxative and found that it worked well for me.  I was flushing enough without adding 4 cups of salt water to the system.

So, what possessed me to do it today? Kendall Macaluso and my own need to conquer the fear.  Kendall is a dear friend from MOPS who is working to get fit after baby.  She has been an awesome lady to get to know.  We run together and talk healthy.  She and her husband have decided to do the cleanse and the other day she asked if I had done the SWF.  I hadn't.  I decided right then and there that if I was going to complete the 10 days on the master cleanse I was going to conquer the fear.  The next time someone asks me if I did it I can say YES. I said the other day that I was all in and I meant it, flush and everything.

Fear Conquered, IT WAS AWEFUL!  Just getting the salt water down was a feat in itself. Getting past the urge to throw it up was an epic battle.  It kind of made me feel sick and I get the same flushing results with the tea.  I'm sticking with that.

We took a nice long walk today and then spent the afternoon swimming.  Grace and Jancsi came home this evening so the day has really gone by fast.  I am now on the home stretch!

Day 7- Scaling the wall

Wow, is it really the close of Day 7?  Wait..... the more pressing question is, have I really gone without eating for an entire week?  Today has been such a feat and such an accomplishment too.  On the Master Cleanse Road map, Day 7 is referred to as "The Wall."  I really hit a wall on day 5 and at the start of today I was feeling good and thinking that I was going to sail right through today.  All in all, today has been good, but I am SO TIRED of drinking my calories.  This monodiet thing is so challenging.  I found myself feeling today like the Israelites in the Bible when they were going through the desert and God provided them with manna.  Manna and water, that was their diet, for days and weeks and months.  No wonder they turned to complaining.  I've lived one week on a monodiet and I have a new appreciation for how they felt.
The wall hit me this afternoon partly because we have had so much down time today and also because Miss Lily Grace is so needy right now.  We didn't get to stay for church because Lily completely revoltes when we drop her off at sunday school these days.  All day it is either "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy" or "Uppie, Uppie, Uppie."  Being low on energy and wanting to eat doesn't help.  Boy it was tough this afternoon.

We decided to head to the Crabtree Valley Mall this afternoon and enjoy the holiday business and window shopping.  I was doing great until we stopped by the food court to get Bob and Lily a snack.  No, it wasn't the food that bothered me, but the fact that we had a major diaper malfunction and I got peed on, BIG TIME.  It was one of those moments where I felt it and could do nothing but endure it.  It ran down my leg pooling in both of my shoes.  That was my wall moment.  In that second I was ready to throw it all in.  Thankfully, I took a couple deep breaths, drank more lemonade, caught the moment on camera and pressed on, WALL SCALED!

I have learned today that as much as I want a break from the lemonade, I have to keep drinking it.  Getting hunger pangs is yucky.

Day 6- Lets do this thing

The sun dawned this morning and I had the blessed realization that I made it past day 5 and after today I only have 4 more days. AHHHHHH!  This morning was kind of a rough one though.  I have been really surprised that the mornings are by far the worst.  I don't know if it is because mornings are when "elimination" happens like a raging force or if it is just the daunting of a new day, but since the start, mornings have been the tough hours.  This morning I think it was being out in the heat coupled with a bit too much cayenne pepper.  I had nauseating heartburn.  It is amazing what your body does to get rid of stuff inside you.   Thankfully I have this wonderful little helper that loves to be in charge of the lemons. She keeps a smile on my face.

Our good friends Shaun and Becky asked if we wanted to head to the Aloha Safari Zoo in Cameron NC to celebrate their little girl Summer's birthday this morning.  I had never heard of that zoo, so we decided, why not?  BEST. ZOO. EVER.  If you have seen "We Bought a Zoo," this little place is like the North Carolina version, complete with family living on the premises.  It was a blast.

 All of the animals were close and visible and many of them were touchable.  It was wonderful and Lily was mesmerized.  She was able to see Tigers and a Grizzly Bear less than 10 feet from her.  It was truly amazing.

The zoo was small, but they had tons of animals.  Lily loved the miniature horses. Since coming back from visiting Feddy, every horse is now Baa Baa (Bon Bon), Hocky (Foxy) or Daddle (Dazzle).  It really is too cute.

I find myself dreaming of food these days.  The funny part is that it isn't a dream where I am enjoying food, but rather a dream where I accidentally eat something and fail at my cleanse.  Last night it was 3 chicken nuggets, and the night before that 1 Peanut M&M.  Who knows what will happen next.

Day 5- Fear

Well, today is officially the half way point or as the master cleansers call it, "hump day."  I think that I had this expectation that once I got past day 3 and 4, supposedly the worst, that day 5 would bring a sense of empowerment and momentum.  Boy was I wrong.  Physically, I actually have felt much better today, but mentally I have had the hardest day so far.  The enormity of this decision and the realization that, at this point, I am all in.  No going back, no quitting.  Eventhough I am halfway, I still have 5 more days followed by the very critical ease out phase.  The realization that I am not going to eat for another week has mentally got me TERRIFIED.  Can I really do this?  I feel so "thin" and weak and low energy, can I really go without food for another week?

The Great Master Cleanser's talk about surrendering to the cleansing process and trusting in the results and experiences of many, but today I feel the weight of my experience and I am honestly fearful.  I am constantly reminded today that with great gain comes great pain.  Although I am not wallowing in pain perse, I am fighting an epic mental battle and doing so on maple syrup and lemon juice, not necessarily battle approved food.  In an effort to push over the hump today I treated myself to an unsweetened herbal tea from Starbucks.  Simple joys.......so delicious.

I know that the next 5 days are the time when a lot of cleansing takes place and supposedly by day 8 I should start feeling some kind of euphoria.  I am hopeful.  This journey is hard, but I am committed to following through.  One step at a time.

Day 4- Awful Miserable Day

The title of the post says it all.  Today has been miserable.  It didn't help that Lily was up at 5:45 screaming for Mommy.  We may be having some nightmares starting and let me tell you, it gets you up and out of bed quickly!  I just felt miserable this morning and the only way I could explain how I felt was annoyed.  Completely, utterly ANNOYED.  My attitude has been in the dumps, every little thing feels like it is world ending and I have honestly wanted to punch someone or something all day.  This is not a good place to be especially with a husband that is running tons of miles and a fussy little girl around you.  YIKES it has been a rough rough day.  Detoxing is really hard.  I am no longer hungry, and I have been having a hard time wanting to even drink the lemonade today.  I just feel wretched, plain and simple.

Thankfully my body is eliminating the toxins pretty regularly and I can feel the yucky leaving my body.  In an effort to get my mind off of my troubles, Bob and Lily took me shopping for a belated Mother's Day gift.  I got a couple of summer shirts and a light classy jacket.  It definitely put a smile on my face.  I am really looking forward to tomorrow because it will be the half way point!  Whoo hoo!  

Day 3- My Tongue

Okay, today has been yucky.  I have felt very poor and down.  This morning as we were headed out to walk, I said to Bob, "My tongue feels coated this morning and I just feel icky."  I have had headaches, neck aches, heartburn and a general sick feeling today.  All day I have had to push myself to just drink the lemonade.  The thought of eating is not even remotely a possibility today.  I just feel sick.  Needless to say I was feeling really down and depressed this afternoon thinking "how am I going to do this."  So I picked up one of my cleansing books and started to read through it.  I came across a section where the author talks about the tongue. It says, "the tongue is a barometer to the body's toxicity.  When you start cleansing, the tongue will turn white and become coated." Looky here......

YEAH!!!! Cleansing has begun!  This afternoon was rough and so long.  I didn't get a nap and Lily picked today of all days to nap for 45 minutes.  Both Lily and Jancsi have entered this aggressive sibling behavior and it is driving Grace and I bonkers.  The second Lily has a toy, Jancsi wants it and hits and screams to get it, and the second Jancsi has something Lily pulls his hair, yanks it away and screams at him.  We seriously cannot leave the kids alone anymore because when we do within a matter of seconds one of them is screaming and the other is crying. Yikes!  At least she took a break from her naughtiness to blow raspberries on my back, thoroughly distracting me from my job of toy janitor.

Day 2- Feelin' the Healin'

Day 2 started out bright and early with what the cleansing crowd refers to as "elimination."  Now, hopefully I don't have to go into detail about what that is.  Let me tell you, a cleansing diet complete with cayenne pepper, herbal laxative and liquid only diet makes for ...........well............it was a special morning, and I am sure the first of many as I continue on this journey.

The best way to describe how I feel today is "thin."  My body is working internally and I just feel spent, tired and low energy.  I have upped the amount of "lemonade" today and by this afternoon I was feeling good again.  I have not felt overly well today either, part of the healing events I suppose.  I had some back and head aches earlier so I took a 2 hour nap which helped.  All in all I have just felt the weight of this experience today.  IT IS BIG.  I am super committed and know that the next 2 days are going to be some of the hardest, but I am still all in.  One day at a time.

It was great to spend the afternoon at Jordan Lake with Grace, Bryce, Jancsi, Bob and Lily.  We had a great time getting sandy and loving the outdoors.  Lily has been a great source of smiles while I have been cleansing.  She is such a doll!

Big physical  benefit I have noticed today:
-My nose is clear and not a lot of drainage or congestion.  I used to get stuffy almost every night when I went to bed.

Lakin' it Baby Style

This past week, Grace and I took the babies to Jordan Lake which is about a half an hour away from us.  We picked a morning we thought would be warm and sunny and headed to the "beach."  Sunny it was, but warm it was not!  The wind was howling at the beach and made for a cold, chilly outing.  The kids could have cared less about it being cold.  Funny how that works.  They had a blast playing in the sand, walking in and out of the water and just generally having a good time.

It is so much fun to watch them throw care to the wind and enjoy every moment, including getting covered from head to bottom in sand!

Day 1- I can do this

Today has been a great day!  It was my first day doing the actual cleanse and I have to say that so far I am loving this experience.  Just so that you know for the next 9 days the only thing that I will consume is 6-8 glasses of "lemonade" which consists of fresh squeezed lemon juice, organic Grade B Maple Syrup and a dash of Cayenne pepper.   I know, many of you probably think it is the craziest thing that you have ever heard, but I have to say, the lemonade keeps you satisfied.  I have to honestly admit that I haven't been overly hungry today and the lemonade has actually tasted really good.  The one lesson I did learn this morning was to not put too much cayenne pepper in the mix.  WOW.  My lemonade turned into fireade and running 4 miles on it was like creating a raging inferno in my belly.  YIKES.

Running this morning was great otherwise.  I don't think that I am going to run over the next couple of days while I am getting into the heart of the cleanse, but I was surprised at how great I felt overall.  I am already down 6 pounds from when I started with the ease in.  I started on Saturday at 126.6 and this morning I weighed in at 120.4  It just goes to show you how much weight (mainly water) we retain due to toxins, processed and unhealthy foods in our diet.

The biggest hurdle to doing this cleanse is the mental fear.  If I start thinking about the fact that I have 9 more days, I get a little anxious and start to doubt.  So I have decided to take one day at a time.  The toughest time of the day is between 2-6pm.  In an attempt to assuage the blah feeling during that time frame, I have added regular outings and events to keep me busy and focused on my goal of succeeding on this cleanse.  The next two days are the days when the most "healing crisis and events" can happen.  If I can make it through the next 2 days I will be well on my way!

Base Camp

Well, today marked the second and last day of my ease in phase.  Tomorrow I will start the cleanse in all its monodiet glory.  I enjoyed fresh fruit and vegetable juice only today, starting with a juice of tomatoe, cucumber, red pepper and spinach.  YUM, no actually it really was.  I then followed it up with fresh orange juice and then finished the day with melon juice, apple juice another vegetable blend and some herbal tea.

I took a nap today with Miss Lily and I am amazed at how well I sleep with my body resting from eating. It really is amazing.  I am nervous about the next 10 days.  I told Bob today that it is like climbing Mt. Everest.  In preparation for the climb, I have made it to Base Camp, but there is a heavy climb ahead.

Bob is being an absolute dear and so supportive.  He has decided to take on his own personal challenge starting tomorrow.  He is going to run 10 miles a day for the 10 days.  I have to say that it is nice to have someone challenging themselves with me.

Headaches have been the biggest issue that I have had to deal with so far.  All of the books talk about a healing crisis.  I have a feeling that my body is going to detox via headaches......for starters.

Starting the Cleansing Journey

Today marked the first day of the "pre-cleanse" portion of my Master Cleanse.  I have spent all day only eating fruits and vegetables.  In a word it has been wonderful, but it is amazing how the desire to consume food is so tied into my mind.

There are several reasons that I decided to do the cleanse.

1. To feel better and break addictions to sugar
2.  Take time to rest and grow physically and spiritually
3.  As a personal challenge

Today I have been really taken back by how prevalent food is throughout our American diets.  Its everywhere telling us what to eat, how to eat, when to eat and above all to EAT.  I was not hungry today while eating my fruits and veggies, however, anything good that I saw on TV or the pizza cooling in the oven tonight I wanted.  WOW.

Today I have really pondered the question do I eat to live or live to eat?

I am really excited to take this journey and am excited to see how I will grow!

The Winds of Change

Last week, Lily and I got to surprise Mom for Mother's Day.  We pulled the surprise off without a hitch and it was PERFECT!  She was absolutely surprised and it was so much fun to shock her with our presence and then tell her that we are moving back to Denver.  So special.

Visiting the mountains again was wonderful and it is so much fun to watch Lily explore and discover everything.  

Now that she is more talkative she loves to try new words and the animals were simply fascinating!  Her favorites of the week were Oreo which started as O-E-O and turned into E-O-E-O-E-O and Bon Bon which sounded a lot lik BAW BAW.  Feddy is still a hard word to say and by the end of the week Lily started calling Feddy and Kemo, Bamma and Bampa.  It is so true that these kiddos find a name that works for their grandparents and run with it.

The Pond held a special fascination for Miss Lily.  WATER!!!! She could not get into the water fast enough.  I was holding her back with all of my strength.  First to do in Colorado.......Get some swimming lessons!

The horse corral was also a special place for her too.  She loved it.  

Scooping poops, playing in the dirt and watching the doggies provided endless hours of fun.

It really was a special week together.  One of the special moments of the week was when Lily's cousins Mckena and Kennleigh came up to the mountain.  

They all love Bon Bon and so they walked up to the horses together.  After seeing this precious moment I couldn't help but be overly excited about moving closer to everyone.

There is so much still to do and I am very overwhelmed, but I am excited about the next big change in our lives.

In other news, I have decided to do The Master Cleanse.  I have been wanting to do a cleanse for a while, but I was either working, pregnant, nursing, training for marathons or simply too busy.  With Bob being home I thought now would be the perfect time.  In preparing for this cleanse, I have been doing a lot of reading on the subject.  So I have decided to journal my experience.  I plan on starting tomorrow, doing 2 days of pre cleanse and then 10 days of the cleanse.  Keep posted to hear my story!