Beauty

My little Evie has simply stolen my heart, just like Lily did.  I cannot believe how amazing she is and how beautiful she is.  There are moments when I look at her and am once again astounded at how miraculous and incredible our God is.   Evie is everything right with the world.

She has this beautiful dark hair that simply covers every inch of her little head.  It covers her ears and her little neck.  I love it.  Her eyes are blue.  A dark ocean blue and when she looks at you all you want to do is just stare endlessly into them.

She has long arms, long fingers and long toes, but she is a little peanut.  Everything about her is sweet and lovely.  There are times when she can scream like no ones business, but she is very laid back and very peaceful.  When she sleeps, she sleeps soundly and at this point can sleep anywhere.  Its wonderful. 

Evie Frances makes me smile every time I look at her.  At night I love to cuddle with her, its a peaceful time and just hers and mine.  When I look at her I cannot help but be amazed and astounded.  Looking at her wipes away the hard and sometimes unbearable moments of my pregnancy.  She is beauty.

But so am I.  Now that my little one is here I am seeing myself differently.  You know about 10 weeks ago I woke up to discover I had several stretch marks on my belly.  I was devastated and cried my eyes out.  After birthing the way I did and seeing the perfect creation my body held, I now look upon my marks as beauty and as a source of great pride and joy.  I am a mother.  My body has sustained and carried two babies.  Two beautiful, perfect little girls and.....

We are beauty.

Just not Today

So I have wanted to blog for a few days right now, but I have so many things going on in my head that I can't get organized enough to get them out.  I am utterly discombobulated lately and feel essentially like I am a little lost in this new version of my life.  I want to talk about everything from how I am feeling to what Evie is doing, to what Lily is doing, to what is happening today, but all of that just seems exhausting! At some point I will have to figure out how to be Super Mom, but not today.

Little Evie is so precious and so different from her sister.  For one thing.....she sleeps!  It is like a new world to have a baby that eats and then goes right back to sleep.  I am eternally grateful for this because I am getting good sleep at night.  Praise the Lord!

I think ultimately what has been the hardest is balancing the quiet peaceful nature of my Evie against the loud, noisy, high energy nature of my Lily.  Was Lily ever so quiet?  In this time of recovery I have found myself overwhelmed and in a space of wanting quiet peaceful moments.  It's normal, I have heard, but its hard to imagine what our new norm is going to look like right now.  Thank the Lord for Grandma Jill.

This go around I feel much more confident in my mothering abilities.  It is amazing how different the second baby is.  Evie and my nursing relationship is phenomenal.  In fact, she has gained a POUND in 1 week and 3 days.  No worries there.

Lily, when she can hold still long enough, loves to hold baby Evie and watch as we change her diaper. She has really been an absolute doll and is such a good little girl in spite of her toddler inclinations.  She has spent a lot of time with her Grandmas.  I was absolutely stunned to see that she is now riding horses by herself and trotting too.  When did she grow up?

I am discovering anew why "they" tell you not to move at the end of your pregnancy.  The moving part wasn't so hard, its all of the things following moving that are super stressful.  Wouldn't you know it....I have to change our address......on everything.  Speaking of everything, what is everything?  New vendors, new services, new accounts........I had all of this memorized........now I have to change it all.  We have got to change our health insurance now that we have added a new member, oh yeah it all has to be done before the end of the month.  Then of course there is still laundry, remembering to feed my toddler and my husband oh yeah and me, while there is a baby needing to be fed.  I want to have a life outside of all of this, but have no idea at present how to get there.

That all being said, I try to focus every day on the fact that right now all that matters is my babies and Bob.  Everything else can wait.  It will be there tomorrow exactly where I left it, but they will never again be where they are today.  Each moment is fleeting and I just don't want to miss it.  Yes life has to go on, and I will have to figure out how to do it all, but just not today.

Look How Far We've Come

Yesterday, Bob and I celebrated our 9 year anniversary.  It was very low key.  I am frankly glad we even remembered it.  I knew that having a baby in June would leave us a little busy, but I did want to make sure we did something to commemorate the day, the years and the life that we have lived.

We have lived a lot of life in the past 9 years.  We have moved many, many times, had friends and lost friends.  We have bought houses and lost houses, had jobs and lost them.  We have dealt with hardships, like infertility, and celebrated the great joy of Lily Grace.  It is simply a testament to the great  grace of our Lord that we have also been blessed with Evie Frances.  We have argued and made up, learned how to fight fair, shed tears and held each other.  We have been up and down, experienced great highs and low lows and we have loved each other through all of them.  I am eternally grateful for this man the Lord has given me.

Sometimes its hard to believe that wedding day was 9 years ago.  Just look how far we've come!

Happy Happy Anniversary, Bob!  Thank you for partnering with me, thank you for our girls, thank you for your love and thank you for choosing me all those years ago.

Evie, this is your Family!

Sweet Baby girl,  sometimes pictures are worth more than words.  Today I want to post some pictures of when you met all of the family!  We are a big happy family little one, and all of these people love you a lot!

McKenna and Lily

Cousin McKenna

Cousin Kennleigh

Aunt Heather

Great Aunt Jayne

Memaw

Papa

Uncle Chase

Uncle Derek 

Great Uncle Tom

Special Moments with Papa

A new generation wrapped in well worn hands

Cuddles with Daddy

Lily and Evie

Hi Girls,

What a week it has been!  Our little family is now complete and girlies, you are sisters!  Lily you were so patient through my pregnancy and now Baby Evie is HERE!  You have been so good with her and she loves you a lot.  I could not be prouder of you.

I remember when you two met last Tuesday.  Evie, you had just come out of my tummy and Aunt Heather brought you, Lily, to the hospital.  You came in the room jumped on the bed and said in your sweet voice, "Hi Baby Evie."  Then you did the most precious of things, you kissed Evie.  Evie you were content and happy ready to be snuggled by your big sister.  It was a special moment.

I hope you girls will always be close.  I know you will be different and won't always see eye to eye, but  the Lord gave you each other and that is a special thing.  Loving each other and supporting each other even when you disagree will make you the best of sisters and the best of friends.

The day after you were born Evie, Lily came down to see you again.  You gave her the most special of gifts, a Minnie Mouse swimsuit and towel.  Lily, I remember the joy you had when you opened your present, you were so happy.  You went over to Memaw and Evie and gave your little sister a big hug.  It made me so very happy.  I love you both dearly.

Since we have been home I have started to see your little sisterhood blossom and I cannot wait to watch it grow.  We girls are going to have so much fun together.

You girls are so very important to your Daddy and me.  We want you always to remember that....

You are pretty, you are smart, you are strong, you are kind, and you are important!

Jesus loves you, Mommy loves you and Daddy loves you too!