Fiber Muffins

I told my Mom and Dad this story and they laughed so hard that I just had to put it on the blog. I have decided that I am not going to be a scrapbooker so this blog is going to be the tell all. I am a little late on this story as it happened over a month ago when I was in the throws of nausea and constipation, but it is still as funny as ever.

There I was, miserable and trying to figure out anything to do to get the constipation to go away. I anxiously called my doctor searching for answers to my major bodily dilemma. Unfortunately, there is very little medication that a pregnant lady can take to get her poop on so I was recommended a heavy dose of prunes, fiber, prune juice, vegetables, bran and did I mention prunes? Of course, in the throws of nausea not one thing on this list sounded palatable, but I was desperate! So I went to the store looking for anything with fiber, prunes or bran in the title. As I was walking down the aisle I saw "Fiber One" Muffin Mix. It was like a homing beacon calling my name. If I had to do fiber, having it in an apple cinnamon muffin was definitely a plus. Add a big gulp of prune juice and I thought I would have a winning combination. Well, I brought it all home and scheduled my muffins for the next morning's breakfast.

The next morning I made the muffins, got one of them down and prayed that it was going to be the magical ticket (it wasn't). At least they were palatable! Plus I had breakfast for the next 11 days. I carefully put the remaining muffins in a plastic bag and stored them in the fridge.

Bob had been out of town for about 4 days through all of this and while I had shared with him my constant dilema, I hadn't shared all my dieting secrets. So he came home on the Thursday of that week at about 10pm at night and was starving. I was sound asleep and completely unaware of what was happening. He opened the fridge door looking for any vestiges of left over food (no such luck with nauseas pregnant lady living there for 4 days straight). Like a moth to a flame his gaze settled on the plastic bag with muffins. Perfect late night snack! He pulled them out and downed about 6 of them then quietly headed to bed.

The next morning he was up bright and early working away. When I woke up about 2 hours after him I headed to the kitchen to continue my regiment of fiber muffins and prune juice. I opened the door and was shocked to find all but 5 of my muffins gone. What happened? So I asked Bob about it and without hesitation he said that he had eaten them. "Those were high fiber muffins honey, they are supposed to help me get regular" I told him. His response was priceless. He turned to me like he had just had an "aha" moment and said, "THATS why I spent all morning in the bathroom, you made me eat poopin' muffins!"

At least they worked for one of us!