It's been a really interesting few months following my 2016 "A" race. Its now a new year and my IRONMAN is now part of my past. It's completely normal to go through the IRONMAN Blues, but I will honestly admit I couldn't have predicted how interesting and challenging the fallout from a year chasing IRONMAN would be.
IRONMAN was my goal, my dream, my aspiration. I decided to chase it 3 years ago. I decided I was going to do it. I committed. I trained every day for a year. I gave up time with my family. I prioritized my goal over them many times. I gave IRONMAN 100% consciously embracing my lack of commitment elsewhere. I chased it......hard.
I will admit it......IRONMAN was an incredibly selfish pursuit. Not only did I daily give to the pursuit of my dream, but I alone was the major victory holder in the culmination of race day. It was my glory. Sure.....my family played a part, but it was me who reaped the incredible rewards of the sacrifices made. I'm the one called IRONMAN.
When it was all over it was so easy for me to wear my shiny medal, embrace my fresh tattoo, look back at all the sacrifices and missed time and say "it was all worth it." It was easy for me to fall right back into a workout-every-day mentality and want be gone. It had been such a fun adventure.......who wouldn't want to keep that going?
I will admit, I was terrified of what it would mean to stop. Absolutely terrified. I was willing to embrace the idea of "off season," but was hoping it still meant getting up every morning, pounding out a workout and planning my whole week around the next workout. I blame myself entirely for thinking this after all, my coach, my friends, my family and everyone around me was telling me that No Bethany, you won't be doing what you have done for the past year. Its all going to change......AND THAT'S A GOOD THING. But it was an unbelievably scary place to be.
What I failed to connect, which ultimately lead to the greatest part of my blues, was that there were 3 people who gave up A LOT and were not wearing medals. They don't have their picture crossing that line, and they didn't earn the title of IRONMAN. They made all the sacrifices without any medals of victory. Bob, Lily and Evie were IRONMAN's greatest supporters, but also his greatest victims.
I know it sounds dramatic, but it was this realization that has helped me crawl out of the blues and embrace the idea of true rest. It has helped me embrace a life not completely dictated by the training schedule again. My greatest hero, my IRONMATE, has told me over and over again that he cannot wait for me to do IRONMAN all over again in 2018, that he stands behind me, but that he just needs some time. I finally get it, and I am finding my place once again.
The beauty of this new space I am in is that I can focus on getting better. I am not training for distance, so I get to focus on quality over quantity. I get to use the time that my kids are in school to train my body instead of getting the distance in during family time. I get to sleep in and stay up late with my husband. Under the guidance of my coach I am relearning the benefit of the track, and improving my swimming by embracing the team coaching with RACELAB and the incredible Bettina. I am slowing down and finding the weaknesses in my technique. I am getting better......all while actually being a present wife and mother. I feel good and rested and..........BALANCED.
I am also nursing a small injury from the months of overuse in my foot. I began to experience arch pain last year in September. I went to the Chiropracter to basically discover a muscle weakness in my foot. He was able to successfully get me through the race with no pain, but following IRONMAN I discovered intense pain in my big toe joint when doing lunges. I am foolish and chalked it up to a tired foot so continued to train on the foot for a month only to discover it wasn't getting better.
Well, I went back to my Chiro and discovered.......I have a big problem that I need to rehab and strengthen to keep myself from the dreaded plantar fascitis and being completely grounded by a foot (I kind of need those for all of this). Thankfully I am in this special place where I can take a week off of running and it doesn't derail a thing.......point in fact......its refreshing. Rest season is a beautiful thing.
It has been interesting and challenging, but I wouldn't trade any of it and I am overly grateful for a husband who flat out loves me......and wants to be with me. He supports all of this, and can't wait to do it all again. He loves me, but he also fights for me.......and IRONMAN won't ever hold a candle to the man I married. I am finding my place following IRONMAN and I am looking forward to what is in store for me and us this year.
Lost Dutchman 8K (Me) and 10K (Bob)
Phoenix Marathon (Bob)
Spring Fever 1/2 Marathon (Me)
Rocky Point Triathlon (Both)
Grand Canyon Rim2River (Both)
Dueces Wild Triathlon (Both)
BAHAMAS (Not racing......just going on VACAY!)
Fueled by Wine 1/2 Marathon (Me)
Mountain Man 1/2 IRONMAN (Me)
Lifetime TRI (Me)
Petrified Forest Marathon (Bob)
Tucson Marathon (Me-gonna attempt to Boston Qualify, HOORAH!)
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