Mountains of Faith

So many of my blogs are just about life in general and all of the good things that are happening to us on a daily basis. Bob and I are so blessed. Still, I want to share with you some of the pain that we have been dealing with too. The past several months have been an overwhelming experience of fear and uncertainty mixed with confusion. We have spent so much time in and out of doctor's offices. When we got married, never in our wildest dreams would we have thought that having children would be so difficult. With so many doctors pouring information, test results and frustration into our lives, I have noticed that the still small voice of the Holy Spirit has become muffled and inaudible. The still small voice that has always told me that Bob and I will be parents, the small voice that has told me that I will experience the joy of being pregnant, the small voice that has always told me that we will have our own little miracle. A couple of weekends ago, I had an amazing conversation with a couple of women who encouraged me and gave me a lot to think about. After the conversation I wanted to share my heart.

Recently, I have been so amazed at how easily doubts and fears can rob us of our joy and decrease our faith. This is especially the case when it comes to having a family. Sometimes the crisis of infertility has clouded my heart and burdened my soul. The fear of the unknown has been a staple in Bob and my life and yet I know that this is not godly. Our church has committed to reading through the entire Bible this year. Over the past week the Lord has brought out so many awesome verses. Matthew 5:3 says “You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.” Then again in chapter 16 “You're not in the drivers seat, I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it.” How awesome is it that we serve a God who is in control and that our circumstances and hardships create in us a strength we could not have imagined. Proverbs 24:10 says “If you fall to pieces in a crisis, there wasn't much to you in the first place.” I pray that the hardships Bob and I are facing continue to strengthen our faith as we daily put God back in the drivers seat.

I love in Matthew 17 when Jesus is talking to the disciples. His followers came to him in frustration wanting to know why they had been unable to throw a demon out of a possessed man. They asked Jesus, "Why couldn't we throw it out?" Jesus responded, “Because you are not taking God seriously,” said Jesus. “The simple truth is that if you had a mere kernel of faith, a poppy seed, say, you would tell this mountain, 'Move!' and it would move. There is nothing you wouldn't be able to tackle.” The disciples had allowed doubts to affect their faith and they missed the Glory of God's miracles working through them. They had no idea the power that the Lord had given them. I realized that the power we have in Christ is beyond our imagination. If only we would tap into it, mountains would be minor compared to all that we could move. Somehow through our world, our culture and our lives we as God's disciples have forgotten the power that we have. Again in Mark 9, a man had a son that was demon possessed and constantly in a fit of seizures. The man came up to the Lord and asked, "If you can do anything, do it. Have a heart and help us." Without missing a moment Jesus clearly responded, “If? There are no 'ifs' among believers. Anything can happen.” How many times a day do we use the word if? I realized that when I speak about children and a family I have always talked about it with an 'if' and not a 'when'. I want to have faith that moves mountains, a faith that says when not if. I love Proverbs 3:5-6 in The Message, “Trust God from the bottom of your heart, don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go.” The phrase "Listen for God's voice in everything you do" is a beautiful reminder to me to trust that still small voice. I love how the Lord reaches out of the pages of the Bible to meet me where I am at, love me in moments of weakness and strengthen my faith. I have a renewed sense of confidence and hope. Proverbs 21:31 “Do your best, prepare for the worst- then trust God to bring victory.” I am claiming the victory of a beautiful baby.

As an act of this renewed faith, Bob and I went out and bought our first newborn onesie. This one literally jumped off of the shelf. It says "Kiss Me" on the front. One day, this little item will be worn on our little miracle. Until then, we will continue praying fervently, hoping unconditionally and trusting God to bring us a victory.

WOW that hurt!

Well the title of my blog this time is completely related to the half marathon at the bottom, so I will catch everyone up on the rest of the news and then share that story.

Well, Jill and Steve came out to visit us over the Valentine's Day weekend. They decided to take a much needed escape from the miserable Chicago weather. I don't think they have seen the sun in a while and of course, we have plenty of sunshine so they loved it! While they were here we headed down to the ASU campus to watch the girls softball team during their tournament.




Bob's Aunt Linda has season tickets and she was able to score some front row spots right behind the...home plate (why the dots? well had to think about that. I was thinking it was the batting spot or the pitching place or the hitting zone...nope, Home plate :) Bob and I were amazed at how tough all of the softball girls looked. They all had legs like tree trunks and the attitude to match. I am not going to lie, I wouldn't want to be at the other end of some of their pitches.




Even Bob the Giant was a bit intimidated. Well the ASU team shut out the team from Portland, Oregon (sorry Caleb and Anna). The other team didn't even get a run in. Not going to lie I felt kind of bad for them. How demoralizing to finish a tournament game 14 to 0. Oh well, can't win'em all. After the game we all headed out for dinner and then a nice night at home. I love when family visits. Bob and I are so blessed to have aamazing parents. Actually that doesn't even begin to describe them. They are awesome, wonderful, loving, giving, wonderful (did I say that already?) caring, supportive, and strong. Everything that Bob and I are we have learned from them! Here is to the best family in the world!

Okay, so back to the news. On Valentines day we headed over to the Superstition Mountains for the Lost Dutchman Race. On the Saturday before the race, Bob's other Aunt Sue flew in from California to run in the race. So we all got up, strapped on our running shoes, numbers and timing chips and headed to the starting line. As you can see, all of my family was good sports when I whipped out the camera at 6AM.





All of us are ready to go. When we got to the race, we packed up our big blanket and boy did it come in handy!



After my personal best 4 mile time, I thought that I would push myself to finish the half marthon in 2 hours flat. That equals 13.1 miles at a 9 minute mile pace. I have never run for that long at a consistent pace and truly I don't know what I was thinking. Bob, my dear hubby, told me that he would run with me and pace for me. He has an awesome watch that does everything, and tells you every statistic. It does everything but run for you. So, the gun went off and so did we. The first 7 miles were okay and I stayed right with Bob. We were even ahead by 1 minute and 20 seconds. One thing I had forgotten about, was that the Lost Dutchman Race is not known for its flat course. Not even close. It was consistent hills. I knew I was going to be in trouble when Mile 3-5 were all downhill. So mile 9-11 was MISERABLE. It hurt so much. I ended up giving all of my minutes back to the hill plus 3 more. Stupid Hill! Well, Bob and I crossed the finish line at 2:02 (2:04 minus the potty break). So painful.

After the race, they serve breakfast burritos and all sorts of food. We had a great time, sitting down and basking in the sun and food. Best post race experience. Unfortunately, I ended up with 3 blisters and a pulled hamstring. That is what I get for trying to go faster than usual.




Well before I go I am going to give an update on the fertility front. We are still not pregnant and trying to make a decision on our next step. Both Bob and I are open to adoption, but neither of us are ready for it. I guess we are not finished trying for our own or mourning the fact that we can't. One Doctor has told us that we may be good candidates for IUI (artificial insemination, much cheaper than IVF) so I think that we are going to give it a try in May of this year. Depending on how the Doctor thinks we did, we will try up to 5 times. Bob and I don't want to be one of those couples who try the same thing 15 different times hoping for a different result. If after 4-5 trys we aren't pregnant, we will check that method off of the list and move on. I am praying that it works. The emotional roller coaster infertility puts you on is sometimes so overwhelming. We are both so looking forward to parenting and pray that it is not just a pipe dream. Sometimes hope is hard to hold on to. Both of us trust in the Lord and believe that He knows what is best, and pray non stop that it is a little one of our own.

Personal Best!

Wow! It has been almost 4 weeks since my last post! Time flies. I laugh because this blog is supposed to be a great outlet for me and a way to keep everyone updated on Bob and I, but sometimes it is way too stressful! Anyways, I finally found some time to get everyone caught up on the last few weeks.

First of all I have to brag a bit! This morning I ran 4.1 miles in 31 minutes! That is the fastest that I have ever run. I think that means that I did an average of 7:40 minutes per mile! That is a personal best for me! It hurt so much. Bob went with me and he and Rocky chased me the whole time. Thank you honey for knowing that my competitive spirit wouldn't let you pass me! I couldn't have done it without you!

Okay back to catching up.....

Well after the marathon, Bob took some time off to recover. I on the other hand started to up my mileage. You see, Bob and I have the most romantic valentine's day plans. We are going to get up early in the morning put on our running shoes and run 13.1 miles at the base of the Superstition Mountains. Ahhh LOVE :) The Lost Dutchman Half Marathon is a smaller race that happens every year. We are looking forward to it as Jill, Steve and Bob's Aunt Sue will be out here running it with us! What a way to spend the day. Running has been a great outlet for Bob and I and it has kept us in great shape. Running is the secret to going down a jean size. To all those women out there who want to lose those infamous "5 pounds".....just start running. No joke! I have finally gotten back in to distance running shape. You know that you have achieved this when you hit the auto running mode where you can go for miles and almost not feel it...almost. Bob and I run 3-4 times a week and head to the gym 1-2 times. It has been great lately because we convinced Anna and Caleb to join so we now have gym buddies! Every Thursday we get together and take the Body Pump weight class. Working out is so much more fun when you do it with friends. Little Josiah goes to the Kidzone and everyone just loves him! I suppose that is not hard to do the kiddo is so stinkin' cute!

Speaking of kids. I am amazed at how many precious little ones Bob and I have in our life right now. Even though we don't have any of our own it seems like the Lord has blessed us with numerous little ones to brighten our lives. This past month we got to celebrate Kate Weatherly's first birthday!


It seems like she just popped into the world and she is already 1. It was so much fun to watch her eat/wear her cake. I think there even was a moment where she sat in it. Kate's big bro Mason has also stolen our hearts. He loves Bob and me and it is so much fun to hear him call out "Bob and Befamy are here!" Warms my heart every time.


It is especially cute to watch Kate and him. Kate is just mesmerized by her big brother. You can tell that she is going to be the girl that wants to do everything he does. Good Luck Matt and Tara!

We had a real special treat about a week ago. Two of my dear friends from the "King and I" play, Laura and Crystal came over with their hubbies for dinner. Crystal and Ben just had their first little one, Rowan, and Laura and Dan are pregnant with their first. Well during dinner I was holding Rowan and all of a sudden she just starts giggling uncontrollably. We were all taken back until we discovered that she was laughing at Rocky. Now Rocky wasn't necessarily doing anything interesting, but Rowan thought he was hilarious. She giggled on and off for about 5 minutes. It was so cute. Ben and Crystal were surprised as it was the first time that Rowan had giggled that long. We were all blessed to be a part of Rowan's joy. Boy sometimes it takes a little one to remind us just how joyful the little things are.

Last weekend Bob's stepsister and family were in town for a few days. We hardly ever get to see Sarah, Shawn and Isabella because they live in Minnesota. Since Isabella was born we have only seen her once.


Here we have this precious little niece and we hardly ever see her. She is all energy and smiles and she LOVES the kitties! My goodness, you couldn't stop her from finding the kitties. Bryce was interested and cuddly while Maddie was totally uninterested. Maddie hid under the bed the whole time much to Bella's chagrin! Sarah, Shawn, Isabella and Shawn's parents Dale and Darlene stayed with us through the weekend. Dale and Darlene drew the short stick and got stuck on the camping air mattress! Sorry we aren't better hosts guys :)

Last Saturday I woke up and decided to go and take a relaxing Yoga class with Traci. I discovered muscle groups I never thought I had. The class was an all levels class. Normally this would be good, but my personality is so competitive, that of course, I had to try all of the advanced moves. I don't think that I have worked that hard to bend my body or stand on my head! If I made a habit out of that class, I would be able to move in directions I never thought possible, thanks to my "Don't tell me I can't do that" attitude. Bob and I always say that if our kids get his athletic ability and my gumption, he/she will probably be an Olympian!


On Saturday night Matt and Tara invited us out to a Comedy Club in Phoenix. So we headed downtown and had a fantastic dinner at Sam's Cafe. Sam's Cafe is this little southwestern grill that sits in this awesome park. We ate so much food, Bob commented that he "wrecked himself." Between chips and salsa, dinner, dessert and second dessert (yes there is such a thing) we were stuffed to the rafters. Tara and I even added a margarita to the mix. The margaritas didn't mess around either. They were so strong that there was a "Limit 2" on them. One was way more than enough for me! After dinner as we walked back through the park, I took some photos. Tara and Matt were laughing that we looked like tourists, but I don't care.



These pictures looked awesome! After dinner we headed to the Dodge Theatre where we saw Gabriele Iglesias. He was a 300+ pound comedian who was absolutely hilarious. He does voices and tells humorous stories. We had a blast!

Oh yeah, one more thing! We got major rain. It was like Arizona was in the tropics for a whole week. The storms were unreal! Here is a picture of Tortilla Flats. Bob, Caleb and Josiah went up and saw the flooded road. Amazing huh? Hard to believe this is Arizona! The flooding was cool but not as good as the prickly pear ice cream, huh Josiah?





Well, that should get everyone up to speed on all the latest Longmire News. I promise to do a nice blog about our Half Marathon over the weekend...should be fun!